11 songs, part 2

11 songs for
11 nonexistent Teen movies



01

Vowing to lose their virginity senior year, four misfit buddies quit the marching band to join the Riverside High football team. In this training montage — weight room, jogging in a thunderstorm — “I can’t stand the rain” by Ann Peebles plays in the heartfelt dramedy “The Sideliners.”

02
At Manhattan’s Horace Mann School, the children of the borough elite often escape the discipline they so richly deserve at the hands of a timid faculty. But when a crew of incorrigible sophomores commit a near-fatal prank (to "Oxford Comma" by Vampire Weekend) Mr. Llewellyn, the new theater arts teacher, risks his career to take on a powerful real estate mogul in the controversial film “A Clockwork Horace.”

03
In the moving domestic portrait “Light Sweet Crude,” Alexander is the teenage son of a business-obsessed Exxon consultant who strikes up an uneasy relationship with his distant, alcoholic stepmother while his father is off prospecting in the Middle East. Snooping through his stepmother’s bedroom, Alexander finds the crumpled evidence of a recent infidelity, and it dawns on him in slo-mo (to “Knife” by Grizzly Bear) that her affair may be justified.

04
As sweethearts Julie and Preston say goodbye for the summer — Julie for horse camp, Preston for the lifeguard’s chair — Julie worries the hunky Preston may have his eye on one of the adoring college girls who lounge around the Twin Oaks Country Club. She just never guessed it would be the tennis pro, Gerard. The song “Hercules’ Theme” by Hercules & Love Affair plays as Preston and Gerard take a forbidden, midnight dip together in the affecting independent film “Backhand/Forehand.”

05
“The Golden Corral Kids” are an ensemble of precocious teens who staff the local all-you-can-eat buffet, mocking the truckers and Mormon families who eat there, all the while dreaming of the day they can leave tiny Adenville, Utah. In a generation-defining scene, co-workers Lily and Barney deflower each other on a box of plastic cutlery, not in a moment of urgent passion, but out of a sense of adolescent obligation — as “3 Fortunate Sailors” by Raccoon plays.

06
“Elizabeth, 1981” centers on an unhappy 15-year-girl from an affluent Chicago suburb, struggling to find herself amid the revelation she was adopted. Here, after a night of dangerous experimentation, Elizabeth crashes the family car and tries to make the predawn phone call home to “Stuck on an Island” by Liz Phair.

07
It is going to be the worst spring break ever. Boy scouts Keith and Gary are stuck finishing an Eagle Scout project while their classmates are off partying in Cancun! The boys are installing a bird-watching deck in a local nature preserve, when they stumble upon some campers… from the Baptist women’s college! "Here Comes the Hotstepper" by Ini Kamoze begins to play as the boys join an erotic campfire in the hit raunchfest “Merit Badges II: Spring Break.”

08
While her parents go through a messy custody dispute, 16-year-old Alexis is sent to Spain to spend the summer at her uncle’s seaside vineyard. She plans to forget herself in books and fieldwork — until she meets Ramón. He takes her for a moped ride through the cobblestone streets of the Costa Brava to “Eres Para Mi (You are for me)” by Julieta Venegas in the bilingual heartwarmer “Sand & Vino.”

09

It’s graduation night, and everybody from Central Valley High is headed to Dagger Point for the party of the year! But in the midst of the celebrations, hearts are broken and dangerous secrets are revealed… And where did prom queen Kimmie Ferrara go? Buddies CJ and Mikey get wise to an uninvited guest at the party, but is it TOO LATE? Here, they find Kimmie’s blood-smeared tiara in the woods (to “Straight to Hell” by The Clash) in the straight-to-DVD thriller “Whisper down the Alley.”

10
Rodney Carraway, a quiet loner, is coaxed out of his shell when he is forced to sell his dying father’s OxyContin to pay the spiraling hospital bills. In this montage, the young entrepreneur establishes his business (and social standing) in the busy halls of Woodrow Wilson High, set to a remix of “You can’t always get what you want” by The Rolling Stones in the movie “Side Effects.”

11
Some kids just need to test the boundaries. Meet Jenny Adler, 14 going on 21 with the fake ID to prove it. But petty offenses lead to big trouble, and Jenny’s compassionate but naïve parents just can’t deal. In this sentimental closing scene, the Adlers drive Jenny home from a Tijuana holding cell. And as Jenny stares out the window with mascara-streaked eyes, she weeps at the realization that her parents love her for who she is, as “Big Love Lullaby” by Emily Wells ends the summer tearjerker “One Size Fits All.”